Post by Zylaa on Dec 27, 2007 17:39:41 GMT -5
by Diana Wynne Jones
Possibly the best guide to cliches ever. Told from the perspective of a guidebook to the tourist who will soon be undergoing a quest in Fantasyland, under the direction of the Managment (author). The guidebook offers entries on everything from dragons to swords to nunneries (for sacking. There is always one survivor). Some of my favorites:
Under Elves: "Great numbers of Elves have become so wearied with the old golden ways that they have all departed, departed into the West. This is correct, provided that you take it with the understanding that Elves do not say anything quite straight. Many Elves have indeed gone west, to Minnesota and thence to California, and finally to Arizona, where they have great fun wearing punk clothes and riding motorbikes."
Fellow Travellers: "These are people who join the Tour for a short while and then leave or get killed. If they have names and characters, then you will be sorry to lose them, otherwise not."
Also contains the theory that Fantasyland horses, since they never require care and never display any restlesness, in fact are vegetables that breed by pollination.
Possibly the best guide to cliches ever. Told from the perspective of a guidebook to the tourist who will soon be undergoing a quest in Fantasyland, under the direction of the Managment (author). The guidebook offers entries on everything from dragons to swords to nunneries (for sacking. There is always one survivor). Some of my favorites:
Under Elves: "Great numbers of Elves have become so wearied with the old golden ways that they have all departed, departed into the West. This is correct, provided that you take it with the understanding that Elves do not say anything quite straight. Many Elves have indeed gone west, to Minnesota and thence to California, and finally to Arizona, where they have great fun wearing punk clothes and riding motorbikes."
Fellow Travellers: "These are people who join the Tour for a short while and then leave or get killed. If they have names and characters, then you will be sorry to lose them, otherwise not."
Also contains the theory that Fantasyland horses, since they never require care and never display any restlesness, in fact are vegetables that breed by pollination.
