The Scenario Game

[Zylaa]

Once again, another game stolen from the NTWF.

Best described by example...

You are sitting in class, bored. You

A. Fall asleep
B. Attempt to magically create fireballs over the teachers' head.
C. Play calculator games
D. Run away, screaming "What am I doing here? There's so much more to life!"

Next person:

C. Play calculator games

You start playing Snake on your calculator, but suddenly the snake is attacked by characters from the Space Invaders game. You

A. Eat the Space Invaders with the Snake
B. Say "Mrs. Teacher Lady or Man As The Case May Be, there's something wrong with my calculator."
C. Quit the game.
D. Make a mental note to up your medication.

And so on.


So! I shall start:

You are trapped in a hedge maze. You

A. Begin to painstakingly find your way out.
B. Shout for help.
C. Acquire a flare gun, somehow, and shoot it off into the air for help.
D. Acquire a flare gun, somehow, and shoot it at the hedges to catch them on fire and burn your way out.

[katanal]

D. Acquire a flare gun, somehow, and shoot it at the hedges to catch them on fire and burn your way out.

Unfortunately, the burning hedges surround you, as you are in a maze, and you are trapped within a vortex (yes a vortex) of fire. Only one path seems to be less on-fire than the others. You

A. Take the path to see where it leads.
B. Punch your way through the burning hedges.
C. Run the opposite direction of the clear path because mazes are never what they appear.
D. Give in to the dark side and use your newfound powers to try to help you.

[Zylaa]

C. Run the opposite direction of the clear path because mazes are never what they appear

Unfortunately, you fail to make the connection that the maze is no longer a maze, but a vortex of fire, and as such it is exactly what it appears to be. You are now very close to being incinerated, although the path behind you remains slightly clearer. You

A. Take the clear path to get the heck out of the fire.
B. Stop, Drop, and Roll
C. Run around in a mindless panic.
D. Shoot your flare gun into the air this time.

[Elycien]

D. Shoot your flare gun into the air this time.

By an extraordinary stroke of luck, you hit a passing goose and it lands in front of you. Quickly, you...

A. Ignore the goose and take the clear path
B. Use the goose as a flail to batter your way out
C. Roast the goose on the flames
D. Rig a towline to the goose and try to get it to fly away, with you dangling beneath it

[Celesauron]

C.

You cook a nice goose dinner but oh no, all the nieghbours have come and want a share! You...

A) Give them all a nice generous piece of goose
B) Tell them they aren't getting any
C) Hide the goose
D) Swallow it in one gulp so they can't say anything

[Zylaa]

B)

Tell them they aren't getting any... because they've mysteriously come through the roaring flames and aren't burnt to a crisp. This makes you curious. You...

A) Ask them how to get out.
B) Use your neighbors to beat out the flames.
C) Ask your neighbors for a fire extinguisher
D) Bribe the neighbors with goose to make them your loyal slaves.

[katanal]

B) Use your neighbors to beat out the flames.

Only, the fire has grown so great while you were thinking about cooking a freaking goose that their paltry human bodies cannot smother it. Instead, you hear their screams of agony as you feed them one by one to the ever-growing flames. The fire, now dozens of feet high is roaring around you. You are consumed by an unearthly energy and your eyes glow white! You:

A) Are on fire. Crap. Get it out!
B) Are actually qS'zzyl (that's a silent q), Lord of the Fire, and speak to the fire in the language of Flames to bend it to your will.
C) Are taken up to heaven in chariots of fire like Elijah.
D) Are burning alive, only to discover that you're actually a pheonix, and you wait to be reborn from the ashes.

[Celesauron]

D)

You turn into ash with a final dying scream but as you are about to be reborn, the firemen come and put the fire out. Your family sees your ashes and puts you in a jar despite the fact that you keep telling them you aren't dead. You:

A) Climb out of the jar and haunt your family as a pile of ash
B) Order a couch and stay here. It is comfy anyway.
C) Plan revenge on the firemen
D) Hum a catchy tune so that your family notices you

[Zylaa]

D)

You pick the catchiest song you know to hum for your family. Unfortunately, the first song that comes to your mind is "Disturbia." Your family, hearing this song, is terrified (and also have that song stuck in their heads). They call up a priest to get your jar of ash exorcised. You...

A) Reassure them by shouting "It's me! I'm not dead!"
B) Cower in fear
C) Climb out of the jar and flee
D) Decide to impersonate an evil spirit, since that sounds like fun.

[Celesauron]

D)

When the priest comes you grab him by the shoulders and shake him as if he was posessed. You then scream some complete gibberish which at least sounds very cool and evil. However your family is not fully convinced of your evil...until you begin singing Best of Queen. Terrified, your family run out of the house along with the priest. Now the whole house is yours. You...

A) Laugh and tear the whole place up
B) Try to materialise as a ghost and explain things to your family
C) Chase after your family
D) Go back into your jar and have a nap in peace

[Elycien]

A)

You've always wanted to be a poltergeist! You throw things and break things and have a lot of fun. Unfortunately, this attracts the attention of some crazy ghost-hunters, who try various bizarre methods to capture you. You decide to...

A) Throw even more things in hopes of scaring them off
B) Leave and go haunt the ghost-hunters' houses so they'll have a nasty surprise when they get home
C) Sing more annoying songs
D) Join them in ghost-hunting, even though you're the ghost they're hunting, just to be confusing

[Zylaa]

D)

You join and claim that you are their young and enthusiastic sidekick who was just introduced this episode to shake things up. This is such a convincing lie that they believe you, and when they can't find any more traces of a ghost around your house, they move on. You suggest that...

A) You all go for a cup of tea.
B) You go and clear out an old castle in the nearby mountains.
C) They give up their way of life and become hermit philosophers.
D) You scan the police reports for signs of ghostly phenomena.

[katanal]

C) You suggest that they give up their way of life and become hermit philosophers. While seeking an uninhabited mountain in the Himalayas, you cross paths with a vicious cougar-man. Its head is that of a lion with the torso of a handsome man and the legs of third world child in an infomercial. Taking pity on the creature in its absurdity and ugliness, you tell your philosopher/ghost hunter friends to come help it, as it is top heavy and has fallen down and can't get up. As they do so, however, the vicious cougar man child roars and devours them all so fast you can't see how in the world that could possibly have happened. Then, the vicious cougar man child turns and looks straight at you and....

A) says "Follow me, youngling, for Xana'rth requests you in the Und'yearth!"
B) attempts to kill you as well.
C) meows gently before falling asleep.
D) changes into a beautiful universally attractive human of an unidentified sex.

[Zylaa]

A) says "Follow me, youngling, for Xana'rth requests you in the Und'yearth!"

You figure that it's best to listen to a creature that, despite defying all laws of physics, has just eaten your two companions. You say "Yes, o great one!" and the cougar man child laughs maniacally, and with a swirl of color and darkness and a sound like a thousand fourth grade recorder players attempting to play Night on Bald Mountain, you are transported into the Und'yearth... which turns out to be a cave with mysterious green torches all around, and elevator music playing in the background. Clearly this is a place of great evil. You...

A) Continue to follow the cougar man child as he leads you to Xana'rth
B) Gasp and try to run away from the evil place.
C) Set yourself on fire with the green torches-- because since you're a phoenix (remember? Post 8?), setting yourself on fire will allow you to be finally reborn!
D) Ask that they please turn off the elevator music.